Bad day.

Hey, just a short post - I really need to have a little vent. Have you ever had those days where lots of little bad things build up over the day until you realise that you're really pretty pissed off and upset about them? That's kind of how my day is going, nothing majorly bad has happened but I still want to curl up in a corner and cry for a bit.

I found out that I failed my clinical reasoning exam - I'm not cut up about it because it was the first one and I wasn't expecting to do well.

My mum is thiking of moving house during the week before I finish for Easter, this probably makes perfect sense to her but it means that I won't get a chance to visit the house again before she moves and I'm kind of attached to that house. (I know it sounds like a silly little thing but combined with other stuff, it's making me sad).

I'm getting fed up with the gossipy-ness of some people on the course, I know stuff like that is hard to avoid with only 90ish people in the year but I'm fed up of feeling like I'm in a fish bowl. There are some things that I don't want to have to tell everyone but if I don't then they will think it's ok to keep gossiping about my private life. This is the one I'm upset about most, it doesn't help that I can't really talk to people about it without explaining some crap things from my past and that will just upset me. :-(

It's getting to the end of the module and we have more exams coming up so I think I'm just tired and letting little things get at me. Roll on Easter, 3 weeks 'off' (well, I'm gonna have to do some revision for the summer exams but at least I won't be learning anything new for a bit!).

Turned out that it wasn't a short post after all, but I feel better. Thanks for reading.

See you soon. :-)

A quick hello...

Hey, sorry it's been a while. I've been meaning to update the blog for a few days but I wanted to wait until my module 2 & 3 exam results came out...... I got them this morning and on the whole I'm pretty pleased. I found the MCQs quite simple and I came out with 85.3%, I passed my clinical skills assessment (but only just on the communication skills bit - I need to be more interested in how things affect the patient and their family). The MEQs were something I was terrified of because of my awful performance last time, but apart from one question I was pleasantly suprised with myself. I think it worked out that I got 63.3% which is good for me, and it would have been more if I'd had a clue what the hell that last question wanted! I'm just waiting for the clinical reasoning exam results to come out at the end of the week, It was the first time we had done those and I don't think I did particularly well, but that's ok (also, I felt like I needed to watch an episode of House before that exam, I think it would have helped).

We've started the musculoskeletal module this month, It's soo interesting but I'm really noticing how fast paced the course is - we've pretty much covered the anatomy (including bones, joints, muscles, nerves and vasculature) of the whole lower limb in 1.5 weeks as well as covering the pathology, clinical skills and other random stuff that comes up in PBL. It's just a bit overwhelming.

We changed PBL groups too at the start of this module, it's wierd! It's difficult figuring out how to deal with all the new stuff going on - friendship dynamics from the last group changing, trying to find my place in this new group, trying to learn the same amount of stuff as before but in a totally different way because my new group want me to be more interactive with them (which is a good thing in theory but I spend so much time trying to work out what I can do for the next session that I don't have enough time to actually learn things!).

In other news, my mum has hopefully sold the house so she is looking to move in about a month, it will be just at the start of my Easter holidays so hopefully I can help her - I really don't like the idea of her moving house while I'm here and then going 'home' to somewhere new. Does that make sense?

I have to go now, I need to put some washing in, tidy the kitchen and then go food shopping. See you soon. :-)

Noooo

Why did Lost season 6 have to start the week before my module 2 & 3 exams, I need to revise but I can't resist watching it. If I fail, do you think the university would accept this as extenuating circumstances?!

I'm still here.

Despite my absence for the last couple of months - I haven't fallen off the face of the Earth! Ok, so firstly - I hope you had a good Christmas and new year. Mine was great, it was really nice to go home and do no work for 3 weeks.

I don't really know how to update you on what's been going on since the last time I posted, med school is still great, my brain is still full (but there are some really interesting things in there). We're just coming up to the end of the cardiovascular module and I've gotta say that I prefered respiratory (despite all the sputum!).

My first set of exams had mixed results - the multiple choice questions (MCQs) went well, I got 74% (later put up to 76% after an error in the marking was found). The modified essay questions (MEQs) were a complete disaster - I totally panicked and couldn't get anything out of my brain and onto paper, I have never frozen on a exam before and I hope that it never happens again because it was awful. By the time I had got into the swing of things, I kept having to stop because my wrist was hurting (have I told you about my bad wrist?) and then I ran out of time. Anyway, I came out of that with 44% (which is crap but it's better than I thought I'd done). We had another MCQ in December, that went well and I got 82% in that. Next exams are in February (MEQs and MCQs), hopefully I won't get the yips again. We have clinical skills assessments too this time, they sound pretty scary as we could be asked to carry out any part of a respiratory or cardiovascular examination.

Not much else has been going on, we're changing pbl groups at the end of this module (2 weeks) and everyone seems to be dreading it. Even though we don't always get along with the people in our groups, we've been together since September and we know how we work. We've bonded and it's going to be hard to split us all up and put us with new people (well, not new people, but you know how the saying goes - better the devil you know than the devil you don't).

I should probably leave it there for now, I have a patient narrative essay to finish by monday that is still refusing to be beaten. It's just so fluffy - I've even used the word 'biopsychosocial' in there, bleugh! Makes me all quivery inside!

Exams

First formative exams this morning - wish me luck!

My brain is full! I can't learn any more, I need a break. We have a few days off next week to revise for our exams on the 2nd of November, I'll be glad of the break because it means that we won't be learning anything new for a few days. How sad is that? Looking forward to a few days revision!

I was going to do a proper blog post, but honestly I can't think straight. I keep losing concentration and staring out of my window, it's horrible - I've got loads of work to do but I can't think well enough to do it. I'll try to get a better post for you next week.

Argh!

MEN! Why do they have to make everything so complicated?! Just because I don't want to date someone doesn't mean that I'm seeing the guy who was sat next to me in pbl! It just means that I don't want to date them! And I don't know what the cryptic comments on facebook are all about, they just make you sound like a lovesick 15 year old! I really thought we could be friends, but instead I cant wait until we change pbl groups so that I can get away from the politics of it all.

Sorry, rant over. I feel much better now. :-)